When you were a kid, did you ever get a mulligan? Mulligans are do-overs.
You struck out but call a mulligan on that final swing. Something wasn’t right. Or during a disc golf game. You released too early and the disc flopped 2 feet in front of you.
At those moments, we all want a do-over. We want to go back in time to change what happened.
So we call a mulligan. We say, “Let me try again.”
They’re the same thing.
Getting a do-over doesn’t change the past. We can’t go back to before we swung the bat or threw the frisbee disc.
It’s just not possible…
Why We Want Do-Overs
Do-overs help us mentally correct what went wrong in the past. We think by doing something NOW, it can overcome what happened in the past.
Yet nothing in the past changed.
The bad throw. The car accident. The hurtful words said to your spouse.
Those things happened. There’s no changing that.
We want to go back and change what’s happened when something goes wrong. It’s human nature to want to fix what’s broken (or to prevent it from happening).
We know that’s not possible, but we still crave that ability.
So we try to call for a do-over.
We swing again. We apologize. We drive a different route.
We Don’t Get Do-Overs. We Get Move Forwards
While we may try to correct what’s happened, nothing is going to change the past. It remains as we lived it.
That’s okay. We can come to terms with that.
When we do, we begin to take on personal responsibility. We begin to own our actions.
From there, we can do what needs to be done.
And that is to get over do-overs and move forward.
What Is A Move Forward?
A move forward is looking at what’s happened in our lives. Our mistakes, our missteps… And realizing that we made bad choices.
Next, we start to make conscious choices of what will happen next.
To move forward:
You think about what you’re going to say to your wife before you say it so you won’t intentionally hurt her feelings
You practice before the big presentation so you don’t trip over your words
You put important family events on the calendar so you won’t forget them
Moving forward is a learning from the past.
You see what you did wrong, you take a mental note, and then you start to put a plan together so they don’t happen again.
Moving forward is better than a do-over. Moving forward corrects our issues and improves our lives.