It’s Not About Making A Point

People often argue over the point. Trying to drive home their argument. Leaving the other party dead in the water.

Getting our point across is not the goal of leadership.

What’s Wrong With Making A Point

In theory, there’s nothing wrong with making a point. A point is what we want to get across to someone.

What’s wrong with making a point is how we often do it.

We belittle the other person’s opinion. Destroying their self-esteem. Tearing them down rather than building them up.

We value the point over the person.

If our goal is to get the point across over the value of a person, we’re not leading. We’re being forceful and coercing.

That’s not where we need to head as leaders.

Make A Difference, Not A Point

Our goal should be to make a difference. Not a point.

What Are Setbacks Good For?

Life throws all sorts of craziness at us. Job losses. Relationship challenges. Devastating health issues.

Our lives are full of events that can set us back.

But I want to challenge you today to look at setbacks in a new light. One that will encourage you and help you move forward.


Setbacks are tough. They challenge us and change our lives. Sometimes they’re overwhelming.

Grieve your setbacks. You have to come to terms with your situation when a setback comes your way.

Name it. Say it. Begin to change it.

What Can A Setback Do For You?

This is the million dollar question. This is what will make you a champion or put you in last place.

Setbacks can either destroy you or they can refine you. The choice is yours.

Gain Influence By Telling Better Stories

We’re story driven beings. From the beginning, stories have been told to pass on vital information.

Somewhere along the line we’ve moved from influential stories to basic facts. And basic facts don’t capture our imagination quite like a great story.

StoryCorps Bus

Image By Steven Depolo

We know leadership is really influence. Influence is the capacity to have an effect on the character, development, or behavior of someone or something, or the effect itself.

And there’s no better way to influence someone than by telling better stories.

Stories have a way of soaking deep into our subconscious. Implanting the narrative, readying it for quick retrieval when we need it.

How Story Works

Myth is the secret opening through which the inexhaustible energies of the cosmos pour into human manifestation.
— Joseph Campbell

Leaders Are Willing To Abandon

Growing up we’re often taught that winners never quit. They stay the course. They’re unwilling to abandon ship.

The older I get, the more I realize the damage this lie has brought into the lives of so many people. And organizations.

The truth is, leaders need to be willing to abandon ship, when appropriate.

Sinking Ship

Image by M. Glasgow

Staying on a sinking ship is asinine. It frequently spells certain doom.

That’s why, once the ship has been cleared, the captain should abandon ship.

And that’s why, as a leader, you must be willing to abandon ship in certain situations.

When To Abandon Ship

Leaders need to be cognizant of when it’s appropriate to abandon a plan. A practice. Or a way of thinking.

When are those times?


Should You Be An Empathic Leader?

There was a time I thought of leadership requiring you to stand tall and stand fast. To be able to quickly detach from your feelings and the feelings of others. To be more detached than attached as a leader. Have you ever been there?

Baby yawning

Image By Tamaki Sono

Recently, my friend Brandon lent me a book called A Whole New Mind: Why Right Brainers Will Rule The World by Daniel Pink. In the book he discusses the differences between right brained and left brained people. One of the chapters dealt with empathy and leadership.

What Is Empathy?

Empathy is the capacity to recognize feelings that are being experienced by another sentient or semi-sentient (in fiction writing) being (via Wikipedia).

What does this mean to you? When you feel empathy, you’re able to relate to others. Seeing and feeling what they’re feeling.