The Power of Connecting With Like Minded People

August 22, 2012 — 52 Comments
The Power of Connecting With Like Minded People | Joseph Lalonde

We live in such a diverse world. People come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. It’s truly amazing.

Our interests are just as diverse. We’ve got people who are athletic, nerdy, funny, smart, etc… A world full of difference.

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Image by Scott Maxwell

Diversity is great. It opens you up to new experiences and ideas. Some you may never have thought of before.

I encourage you to seek diversity.

But I also encourage you to seek out like minded people.

WHY?

It might seem odd that I’m encouraging you to seek out like minded people. Why would you want to seek out people with similar interests?

It’s quite simple actually. You should seek out like minded people for their encouragement. And the encouragement that they can bring to you.

Finding others who are pursuing their passions and desires can bring a huge boost to your pursuit of the lifestyle you desire.

I found that out recently.

My good friend Kimanzi Constable encouraged me to call him recently. I’d been having a rough time and he wanted to encourage me and share part of his journey. During our conversation my spirits were lifted and I felt ready to go get ‘em.

Another friend picked up the phone not too long after and gave me a ring. During our chat we discussed what we’re pursuing, what we want to do, and what’s been going on in our lives. It was another time of encouragement.

When you’re talking to like-minded people you begin to catch the enthusiasm of the other person. It works both ways and you both end the conversation feeling pumped for what’s next.

It’s a great way to get that boost forward. To get the encouragement you need to move to the next level.

APPLY

How can you do this? It’s really simple.

  • Make a list of the qualities you would like to have
  • Begin watching and interacting with others
  • Gravitate toward those who are pursuing the same passions as you.
  • Connect and form friendships

Before you know it you’ll be on the pathway to success. You’ll have budding relationships that are pushing you and your friends towards goals unimaginable. All it takes is the first step. Take it and achieve greatness.

You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.– Jim Rohn

Question: How do you seek out like-minded people in your life? Please share your thoughts in the comment section below.

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  • http://chrisvonada.info/ chris vonada

    Good stuff Joe (and I’m glad to think of you as a like-minded friend!).

    Meeting people isn’t that difficult for me, I am at a place in life where I have opportunity to meet a lot of people, mainly through a part-time job at a Planet Fitness… I’ve met thousands of people there over the past year. The real challenge is identifying the right ones to let into my inner circle, if you will. Generally, I have found that like-minded people gravitate toward each other… however, I am also very gullible at times so I have keep a constant vigil on those who may try to take advantage of me in on way or another.

    • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

      That’s the hard part Chris, discovering who’s right to be in your inner circle. And it sucks that people can look to take advantage of others. That comes from a weakness on their end, that there’s scarcity and you must take advantage of others. I’d still encourage you to create those relationships. If you notice that a person is trying to take advantage of you, let them know and start to distance yourself from them if they don’t change.

  • http://www.brandongilliland.com/ Brandon Gilliland

    Being like-minded with others is important…especially for close friends. Great stuff!

    • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

      Yeah, your close friends should hold the same belief system as you. Just like I ended the post with, those you spend time with affect you more than you think. Choose wisely. How are you making that choice?

      • http://www.brandongilliland.com/ Brandon Gilliland

        I am friends with a lot of people, but I only have a select few who share the same belief as me. These are the ones that I am the closest to.

  • http://www.danerickson.net/ Dan Erickson

    Nice post, Joe.  I agree that connecting with like-minded people can be excellent for encouragement.  I like your example of the phone calls as I’ve had similar experiences recently.  In Interpersonal Communication courses I teach that it’s good to have friends with both similarities and differences as it creates a healthy balance.

    • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

      Dan, glad to hear you’ve been having similar experiences happening to you as well. Do you feel phone calls and in person meetings are better than email contacts?

      • http://www.danerickson.net/ Dan Erickson

        I think both phone/in-person and email have strengths.  Email works better for an ongoing discussion about work/business.  But when it comes to personal support phone and in-person wins.  Hearing someone’s voice is comforting and seeing them even better.

  • http://JaredLatigo.com/ Jared Latigo

    Great post Joe! I totally agree with it and was just thinking about that other day actually. Seems that we gravitate to those people almost without knowing it anyway.

    • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

      Sometimes I wonder if we seek out the like minded people or if we become to be more like those that we hang around thus making it seem like we’re seeking out like minded people. Any thoughts on that Jared?

      • http://JaredLatigo.com/ Jared Latigo

        I think it may be a bit of both. Personally, I lean to the first one though because I think when we find people we truly connect with, they put into words things we haven’t been able to. 

        Can definitely see how it can be either or though. Great question! What do you think?

        • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

           I think it depends if we’re being intentional with our lives. When we’re younger, I think we become more like those that we’re hanging out with.

          As we age, I think we begin to notice there are relationships that are good or bad for us. We begin to seek out those we would like to become like.

          • http://JaredLatigo.com/ Jared Latigo

            Yeah, good point. I would agree there. Maybe I’m at that inflection point where I’m not considered “young” anymore. LOL

  • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

    Just re-discovering the importance of having other like-minded people in life :) My hubby and I are at that place of seeking and establishing new relationships. It can be disorienting when doing this in a new culture, nation and people – but the stretch has been working miracles for our growth and capacities.
    Great post

    • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

      It’s a game changer isn’t it? How do you seek out like-minded people in your life?

      • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

        previously it was the usual haunts – church, meetings, work, friends-of-friends e.t.c. Now we are trying to figure it out :)

        • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

           Nice. Let me know if you find any new ways to seek out like minded people.

          I just had a great experience this past weekend by going to a WordCamp conference. It allowed me to meet up with fellow bloggers and friends in a new setting. Definitely a great way to connect.

          • http://intentionaltoday.com/ Ngina Otiende

             Yeah i saw all your back and forths with Kimanzi and others on twitter. Looks like you guys were having a ball. Definitely a great way to connect and something am hopping to be able to do soon.

            • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

               It was a ton of fun. We had a nice group of 4-5 people that we connected with at the event. Be on the lookout for one, I think you’d really enjoy it. And who knows! Maybe @kimanzi:disqus  will be speaking at the event.

  • http://tcavey.blogspot.com/ TCAvey

     This reminds me of the saying “Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future.”

    While we have to be careful to not exclude others (Jesus went among the sinners) we also have to be around healthy Christians (Jesus and his apostles) in order to mature and grow.
    We can never fully help others if we are not helping ourselves. It’s like on a plane, we are told that in case of an emergency to put the mask on us first, then help our children.

    • http://talesofwork.com/ kimanzi constable

      That was an awesome post TC!

      • http://tcavey.blogspot.com/ TCAvey

        Thank you.

    • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

       TC, I’m with you on that. We can’t exclude others but I think our closest connections need to be with those that are like-minded and able to lift us up in our journey.

      I heard something recently that really made me think regarding our relationships. While Jesus sought out sinners, he also had a core of 12 like-minded people he hung around. He then had his inner circle of three. And then his 1.

      He welcomed all but made sure to be with his core group often.

      • http://tcavey.blogspot.com/ TCAvey

        Great point!
        I know I already pray for my toddlers future friends. I would rather he have one good friend (besides Christ) than 20 decent friends.

        I feel so blessed to be part of this blogging community. We share the values of Christ and many of us are also aspiring authors.
        Thank you for all you teach me and for your support. I appreciate it. God bless.

  • http://josephiregbu.com/ Joseph Iregbu

    On point Namesake, on point!

    • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

       Thanks Joseph! Do you have any suggestions on meeting new, like-minded people?

  • http://talesofwork.com/ kimanzi constable

    I saw a real life example of this post by having you (Joe), Alana, and Rich there when I spoke this past weekend. I felt so much more comfortable and it was awesome to hang out all day. Thanks for the shout out and a lot of us that run in the same circles online need to get together and talk more!

    • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

      It was an awesome meeting, wasn’t it? My mind keeps returning to the great time we had during the event!

      How would you recommend those that run in the same online circles to get together and talk more?

      • http://kimanziconstable.com/ kimanzi constable

        Maybe a once or twice a year meet up?

        • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

          That’s a great idea.

  • http://undistractedchristian.com/ Tyler Hess

    pretty simple: blogs, twitter and church!

    • http://www.michaelgholmes.com/ Mike Holmes

      Amen! And that of course leads to Facebook lol!

    • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

       Great ways Tyler. I like to connect with others using the same tools. But do you ever feel like connecting in person creates a whole new synergy?

      • http://undistractedchristian.com/ Tyler Hess

        i don’t know how to respond to your business school buzz word, but it is definitely different, especially for this shy kid.

        • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

          Sorry for the buzz word Tyler. Sometimes they slip out. 

  • http://www.michaelgholmes.com/ Mike Holmes

    Personally, I’m working with people who are on another level than me. People who push, prod, and compel me to change. How do I seek them out? I just look for people who are doing more than me and and go in that direction. :)

    • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

       I like your thinking Mike! The more you surround yourself with that type of person, the more you’ll become like them. Keep it up!

  • http://danblackonleadership.com/ Dan Black

    I think if you are living out your passions and moving toward your dreams then you will attract link minded people. I have found social media and blogs a great way to find and connect with like minded people. Great thoughts. 

    • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

       Awesome Dan!

    • http://www.alanamokma.com/ Alana Mokma

      I agree with Dan – blogs have been one key way for me to connect with people who are like-minded. 

      To piggy-back on your answer to Jeff, I was recently asked this question and it both caused me to think deeply and allowed for others to get to know me better: “If you had one day to yourself to do whatever you wanted, what would you do with your time?” The answers from various people were widespread: “I’d go to Colorado, find my favorite tree and hunt all day long.” “I’d practice yoga, then write.” “I’d get a massage.” “I’d go dancing, meet up with some friends for coffee, then cuddle with my husband.” “I’d go fly fishing.” It was really neat to see to see the variety of answers that came in… these answers clued me in to some of the people I may be interested in getting to know even more!

      Joe, you make a good point about how important it is to invest time in relationships with people who are like-minded. A couple years ago, my husband and I had very few relationships like this. When we talked about things that were (deep) and important to us, our aspirations were met with blank stares. It’s as if we were speaking a different language from the people we wanted to share our lives with. I felt alienated and like I was crazy. Since finding a few friendships where we can talk about these things, and be met with encouragement, Josh and I have both experienced growth. It’s a pretty cool thing. :) 

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  • jeff

    That is a good quote by Jim Rohn.  I suppose the people I spend time with really do have the effect of leading me toward greater things or toward stagnation.

    Your advice seems to assume that I would already been in environments where other people’s interests are discoverable.  When I go to small church groups, for example, personal interests rarely seem to come up, and when they do, there aren’t any interests that I would like to know more about from them, except of course, as a matter of conversation and general connection.

    What do I do?  

    • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

      Here’s two ways to help bring out the interests of others:

      One way to discover the personal interests of others is to ask them. Ask questions like “So Bob, what are you doing this weekend?” or even “So Tim, what do you like to do outside of work?”

      Two: I know you’ve said you’re unsure of what you’re interested in at times, but try to share an interest of yours with the group. Maybe bring it up as something you’re doing this weekend. Frequently, people are waiting for others to open up.

      • jeff

        I do sense the tension in my new group that people are bursting to open up more.

        • http://www.jmlalonde.com Joe Lalonde

           That’s great Jeff. It might mean they’re getting ready to open up. Maybe you need to provide the fire to get them to share.

          • jeff

            I certainly have an incentive to do so.  I seem to be one of the only 2 people who don’t already have a friend in the group.

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