Archives For relationships

There are leaders who lead by title only.

You know the ones. They push forward through threats of intimidation and power grabs.

No one really likes them. Yet they continue to work for them because of fear.

titles are unimportant, this is

Title Means Nothing

People have had titles bestowed upon them for ages. Sometimes they’re right to give the title. Other times they’re not.

They give a title so someone who’s looking for power or wealth. This person feels entitled and abuses the title.

So much so, others see through the veneer. And they begin to revolt.

These followers might not tell the leader by title only their thoughts. Rather they may:

Stop working hard

Begin talking behind the leadership’s back

Look for new work

Plot to overthrow the current leader

We can all rule by title. We can’t lead by title alone, though.

One of the things I’ve struggled with as a youth leader has been how we call others to a saving knowledge of Christ. It always seemed so hooky.

The typical way we present Christ is through a message on a Sunday morning or Wednesday night. We share about Christ’s work and then invite people to accept Him into their hearts.

That or we do run-and-gun missionary work. This is where you hit the streets, tell the world they’re sinners, and try to get them to repent.

Build relationships, build followers

Image via Sam Beebe

Now, these methods have worked, or seemed to work, for quite some time. But I’ve always wondered if there was a better way to promote the Gospel and tell of what Christ has done.

My friend, Dave Arnold, recently released his new book titled Building Friendships: The Foundation For Missional Engagement. And his book hit on something that’s been stirring within me.

Your gut rumbles. Deep down you feel something is off.

But you brush off the feeling.

The blame is placed on the bad Chinese food you had last night or the spicy chili you had for breakfast. The gut rumblings are more physical than intellectual. Or so you tell yourself.

Listen To Your Gut

God has given us an incredible intuition. Even without knowing all of the facts, we can often tell when there’s danger or something isn’t right.

You know what I’m talking about…

The scared feeling you have walking down a darkened alley

The inability to breath as you jump out of a perfectly good airplane

The small voice in the back of your head telling you you’re about to make a bad decision

Your intuition is trying to tell you something. That’s the gut rumblings I’m talking about.

Our good friend John Maxwell has always said that leadership is influence. I firmly believe that.

Leading requires us to have a certain amount of influence on others. Yet we’ve also mistaken what influence truly is.

Influence is often unseen

Image by Marco

What Influence Isn’t

Influence isn’t getting others to do what you want them to do.

Influence isn’t controlling others.

Influence isn’t forcing people to do your will.

Influence isn’t manipulating others.

Influence isn’t showing off.

Influence isn’t a Klout score

Influence isn’t is the number of followers you have.

There are so many things that leadership is but the above isn’t true influence.

What Influence Is

Influence is impacting lives.

Influence is making a difference in the lives of others.

Influence is showing how much you care.

Influence is taking the time to do something nice for another person.

Why We Need Community

July 3, 2015 — 4 Comments

I’ve always believed that community is important. We must live and interact with others if we want to truly thrive.

The sad truth is, I haven’t lived this well recently.

Over the past year or so, my relationships with others have fallen by the wayside. Replaced with work or my inner thoughts.

It’s a struggle I’ve had and I’m not ashamed to admit.

Why Community?

Community is a powerful thing. Community is there to hold you up. Community is there to hold you accountable. Community is there to back you.

Something truly spectacular happens when we begin entering into relationships with those around us. We begin to experience who we truly are.

Desmond Tutu said:

A person is a person through other persons

Andy Snyder put community this way:

We need others to help us become ourselves