Looking Back To Move Forward

There are many things in life I wish I could do over. But I can’t.

The past is the past and there’s no changing it.

Your past is a powerful learning tool

Image By Jason Powell

People will go so far as to say that we shouldn’t reflect on the past. It’s done and over with.

No use crying over spilled milk. Or so the saying goes.

The Wrong Attitude

From my experience, this is the wrong attitude to carry in life. Moving on from the past and never analyzing the past is a disaster waiting to happen.

There’s another saying:

Those who fail to learn from the past are doomed to repeat it.

My belief is this quote on the past is a better mantra to carry on in life.

Get rid of the wrong attitude on the past. Take a new view on the past.

Who Are You?

Throughout our lives, we have multiple identities. We may be fathers, husbands, wives, sisters, brothers, leaders, businessmen, athletes, and the list goes on.

We have title after title. We have position after position. We have responsibility after responsibility.

The crazy thing is, we can get lost and easily forget who we are.

We don't always know our identity

Image by Hape Gera

That’s one of the reasons why I loved watched the beginning of CBS’s CSI: Miami. The theme song for the show was The Who’s Who Are You song.

Who Are You is a catchy song that, at the beginning, simply asks Who are you? Who, who, who, who?

The question is pointed and it’s loaded.

Do you know who you are? Do I know who you are? Who are you?

There’s a good reason this resonates with me. It should resonate with you.

Your Past Doesn’t Define You. It Helps Shape You

Everyone has a past. We all know this.

Some pasts are filled with darkness: Sexual abuse. Emotional abuse. Accidents. Fear

Some pasts are filled with light: Great families. A happy childhood. Adventures lived again and again.

And most are filled with a mixture of the light and darkness.

Regardless of how much light or darkness we have in our pasts, we can’t allow our pasts to define us.

Our pasts tend to leave a mark on us. Our opinions are typically formed on the basis of what we’ve experienced.

We see our worth through lenses tinted by our past.

“Who we are in the present includes who we were in the past.”
Mister Fred Rogers

Your Past Doesn’t Define You

We see so many people dogged by their past. They live in their failures or success.

The Scars That Lie Beneath

My wife and I have recently found a show we really enjoy. It’s called Arrow on the CW.

Arrow follows the story of Oliver Queen after he is rescued from a remote island.

Bridge

Image by Paul Bica

Oliver pretends to return to his previous life as a rich playboy. Except that’s not who he is now.

The island had changed him. It left him with scars. Both physical and mental. And it’s changed his mindset.

His story got me thinking about the issues we face in our daily lives. How we’re often left with mental scars that redirect our lives.

How We Get Mental Scars

We are left with mental scars by many of the situations we face daily.

An abusive boss. An argument we had with our spouse. Words said by an abusive father.

The wounds cut deep and leave us altered. Guarded and scared.